The Brilliant Weblog award is a prize given to sites and blogs that are smart and brilliant both in their content and their design. The purpose of the prize is to promote as many blogs as possible in the blogosphere.

The Rules of the Award say:

• When you receive the prize you must write a post showing it, together with the name of who has given it to you, and link them back.
• Choose a minimum of 7 blogs (or even more) that you find brilliant in their content or design.
• Show their names and links and leave them a comment informing they were prized with the Brilliant Weblog Award.
• Show a picture of those who awarded you and those you give the prize (optional).
• And then we pass it on!

These are blogs that make my day!

Jammy - The good ol’ funny man of blogosphere.

Krish Ashok - Third time he’s getting tagged by the Telugu Ink Manufacturing company!

Anju Sabu - A brilliant illustrator. Check this out. Me simply loves her slimy friend!

The Desi Pradhan Mantri.

Rakesh Jhunjhunwala. The Sensex tycoon’s lesser known avatar fake blog! Amazingly makes fun of everybody and gets away with it! Simply hilarious!

I’m sightcha bending the rules and stopping with 5. There are so many other blogs that I enjoy reading which can be accessed in my blogroll.

It really pisses me off when I see Indians bitching about our country to outsiders.

Not that I’m a very patriotic soul, who would die for the country. But I still respect and love our country a lot!

This particular desi went on ranting about…

Children going to work

Construction of dams

Apparently, construction of dams in our country has led to fight between the states which makes our country bad. WTF! How can he forget that agriculture is the basic occupation in our country and that agriculture requires dams to survive.

Politics

Bah! Where in the world has politicians been good? And this dude goes on to say that in India, actors enter politics. The way he said was

Here in India, he he, actors enter, he he, politics, he he. Its, he he, very strange, he he!

Our hero probably forgot or doesnt know that actors entering politics is a widespread disease all over the world!

Auto majors in Chennai

Again, same tone.

I cant believe that, he he, so many auto majors are coming to, he he, set up manufacturing units in Chennai! He he, this place is like a very, he he, sleepy place! I dont know how, he he, they manage!

Corruption in Police Force

A bit of ranting about policemen  and corruption, again, a widespread phenomenon!

Parliament Shootout

In India, he he, people can just walk in with guns, he he, inside the parliament complex and shoot!

I still dont understand what was so funny in that! When terrorism is a common enemy to all of India and most of the world, this chap made a joke out of it.

Jewellery

In India, he he, people wear so much jewellery!

Indians have money to spend! Whats the problem! We should be proud that India is a rich country!

Road Rage

Referring to the infamous road rage case involving former MP and cricketer, Navjot Singh Sidhu,

In Delhi, he he, there was a fight between two guys over parking space, he he, and one of the guys, a sikh beat the other man, he he, to death! It always happens here!

This is just a very small list. He would go on to rant about people committing crimes and going scot free, politicians spending a rich lifestyle in jails, Indian movies, directions and sign boards in India, bus routes and public transport, caste system, feuds in villages, couples making out at public places and lots more which I cant remember.

It was actually sad that people rant about our country to outsiders.

I could actually think of a lot of good things in India when he was telling this.

India is the world’s 12th largest economy and the second fastest growing economy. The World Bank places India as the 4th largest in purchasing power.

India at one point fo time was one of the world’s most advanced civilization, with advances in engineering, art, philosophy, medicine, astronomy, science, literature and much more.

The most diverse culture can be found nowhere else in the world, with Dravidian, Aryan, Persian, Iranian, Scythians, Greeks, Mongols and a lot more blending into a rich cuture.

From here, I link to chapter 1 of Shashi Tharoor’s India: From Midnight to the Millennium, which is a brilliant book by itself. I would suggest you to pick up a copy for yourself. Its worth a buy.

As for the dude who has featured in this post, you may or may not read this post. But if you do read, clues are ample for yourself to know that it’s you; and let me assure that its nothing personal. Please do note that India is one of the well balanced countries in the world. We may have our share of mishaps and problems, but we also have our share of good things as well.

Now I know what to expect when you take two women to breakfast.

I’m now richer by gyaan! Gyaan on where can one find better slippers at lower prices, where you get good heels and where you get good flat slippers.

—

After a while,

Suraksha: We should meet up for lunch some other day again.

Sharanya: Cool! We’ll make it a post Madras Week Lunch!

Suraksha: Ooh! I’m so excited!

Me: Mmm… The Sambhar Idli is delicious.

Sharanya: We should make it breakfast and not lunch!

Suraksha: yea. So we can have a leisurly food!

Sharanya: Ooh! I’m so excited!

Me: The chutney is great too.

—

Again some talk on where you get slippers in Adyar. Apparently, there is a potti kadai near the tea shop at 11th cross street, where you get awesome heels.

—

The crux of the breakfast conversation was this!

Sharanya: Shall we go to City Center.

Suraksha: Cool! I’m in!

Sharanya (turning to me) You coming?

Me: Hmmm… I…

Suraksha: You going shopping?

Sharanya: Yea. I need to pick up a couple of lingeries!

Me: WTF! Why’re you calling me for that!

Sharanya: Eh! Whats wrong! Anand has accompanied me once!

Enna Koduma Saar idhu!

There were some really funny conversations involving Preeti.

—

Preeti (referring to Aravind): So you guys are one team is it?

Me: Yes.

Preeti: So do you guys have an office?

Me (thinking I had heard wrong): Heh? Pardon!

Preeti: I mean, do you people have a real office - with cubicles and computers?

—

During dinner, Ram ordered vodka for himself.

Preeti: I want to have some of that.

Ram: You’ll have to wait.

Preeti’s eyes lit up.

Preeti: How long?!

Ram: Two years.

—

During the drive back.

Me: Phew! They were cool! They are like the top artists in jazz and we were chatting like childhood friends!

Ram: Yeah. They’re pretty cool!

Preeti: Definitely! Also when Aravind asked them… Um… Do I call him Aravind? Or is it Aravind uncle? Or should I call him Aravind mama?

—

For those who didn’t get it.

Mama - slang in Tamil for pimp.

Setup Chellappa - A character of pimp played by Vadivelu in a random tamil movie.

Kanchipuram, Brilliant weather. 5 shutterbugs. 6 cameras. 1 Renault Logan.

Erina, Joel, Aravind, Me and Alexandra

It says Nothing should be pasted or written on the wall. Funny people.

Will I get the gift voucher from Univercell if I send this to NXG?

Joel and Erina with the local kids

Aravind - Yea, the same guy who laughs at his own ‘jokes’.

Alexandra.

And finally myself! And Alxandra at the background.

More photographs here.

There were some funny moments esp the time when we had actually passed Randhan looking for it. When we asked a village bumpkin for directions,

Me: Anne! Randhan epdi ne ponum?

(How do I go to Randhan?)

Village Bumpkin: Randhan ah? Adhu poirichu baa!

(Randhan? You have crossed it!)

Me: Seri ne. Ippo epdi ne ponum?

(Ok bro. Tell me how to go now.)

V.B: Adhu poirichu baa.

(You have passed it!)

Joel took over:

Joel: Adhu seri ne. Ippo epdi ne ponum?

(Thats okay. How do we proceed from here.)

V.B: Adhu poirichu baa.

(You have passed the place!)

Joel: Podaaaang……

($^%&*$)

Alexandra is the girl who has replaced Lorrene Durret at Alliance Francaise De Madras and is going to be in Chennai for the next six months.

We (Alexandra, Joel, Aravind and Me) were having a long discussion about photography and stuff first at Goethe Institute and later at Fruit Shop on Greame’s Road yesterday. Point to be noted is that Joel and Aravind know French and I dont.

Alexandra asked me,

“Narain, I have a deal for you. I teach you French and you teach me Tamizh. What say?”

*The scene freezes here and goes back to last month when Lorrene was flying back to France at the end of her tenure*

She had worked with Joel on a couple of workshops on photography. They also had a deal that Lorrene would teach Joel French and Joel would teach her Tamizh.

The deal worked great. Atleast thats what Joel told me.

When I last met Lorrene, I managed in my best French and told her,

“Lorrene, Bon Jour!”

And Lorrene shot back,”Dei Kasmalom! Un munji mela yen kaiyya vekka! Adhan email irukku la! Aprom innaa bon jour palaya soru nu! Bemani!”

——————-

As they say Once bitten twice shy, I refused the offer.

Enna Koduma Saar Idhu!

Last week when a few of our elderly relatives who think talking about girls, love and sex is bad dropped in and we were having a tough time due to this.

I was bored to death and was watching TV when the Cadbury Calebrations ad was featured in which the kid in hostel doesnt get any gift from his sister. Even as he shows some great histrionics, his sister walks in and blah blah…

Due to extreme boredom, my mom blurted out,”The kid looks cute, doesnt he?”

I shot back,” Yea. But the elder sister looks even more cute.”

Two pairs of eyes turned abruptly towards me and glared while my mom held back a giggle.

I dont know what ate them, but they seemed to be in a hurry and left.

——-

In another instance, I was having a brainstorming session with Ram and Aravind and we were talking about the biking clubs and running clubs in Chennai.

Ram: We need to contact the folks behind these clubs and talk to them

Me: Yea right. Those are jobless fat people who have money to waste.

Ram: Hmmm… I’m a member there.

Me: Well… Um…. Er…. He He He…. I mean… SHIT!

Here it goes.

Peter Pan! I just got slapped with a wet salmon - really - I have not updated this since long before Shakespeare wast a boy… You would not believe that I’d been abducted by aliens. Stupid Global Warming!.

I am flat out like a lizard drinking with learning to play lawn bowls, a ticking crocodile, just generally being Snow White to the bodyguards of the blogger I am stalking, my day is filled with fluorescent light from when the nightclubs close to I run out of alcohol. I am avoiding recapture. life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get.

I swear on the bones of my ancestors I will make more of an effort to blog more often until the nice men in the white coats come back. If you have kids. The Piccaninnies say I have to!.

Wierd! Anyway, I really have not been finding time to blog.

To know more on what I have been doing, you can check out Aravind’s blog.

In other news, I have been composing a few songs and badly need lyrics. In case, you think we can work together, please drop me a mail. Language no bar. Genre is mostly soft rock, alternative, experimental and nu metal.

Also, if any of you can play any wind instrument, again please mail me. Gapp, are you done with learning to play the tin whistle?

Let the soul of Randy Pausch RIP.

This video, The Last Lecture is darkly funny and humorously sad - I don’t know how to put it. You have to watch it to experience it. I’m visiting Landmark this weekend to lay my hands on the book, The Last Lecture which is based on the lecture.

*Sniff*

This is an ode to the hundreds of Kanniappas and Muniammas lurking the streets of Madras!

Picture this - its 5 in the evening on a sultry Sunday at Pondy Bazaar, T Nagar and Kanniappa is zooming through on his Bajaj M80 carrying a load of live chicken to the slaughter house at a speed of 80 kmph. Muniamma is standing at a signal and is impatient to cross the road to buy some jasmine flowers for her hair which already resembles a mini botanical garden. She is impatient because it is Aadi thallupadi and she wants to go to Pothys to buy the saree which Asin wore in the movie, Dasavataram before Vadivu does.

Due to this impatience, she starts crossing the road even as the signal shows amber.

As the signal turned to amber, Kanniappa who was still a good distance from the crossing shifts down and revs forward to cross the signal before it turned red.

They both almost collide into each other.

What ensues next is a verbatim English translation.

Muniamma: Customer of death!

Kanniappa: You are the customer of death! Have you informed your folks back home?

M: You are driving like hair!

K: And you are crossing the road like pubic hair!

M: People like you have got fat in the ass!

Who doesnt!?

K (releases the clutch and moves forward while muttering curses) People like her have got audacity in the vagina!

(Translate the entire conversation for yourselves. If you dont know Tamzh, please ask your friends or drop me a mail and I’ll mail you the convo in Tamizh)

Like I said, there are hundreds of Ks and Ms lurking the streets of Madras. So, please make use of public transport or better stay indoors.